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What's hard for teenagers
Loving your step-child can be both simple and hard. It is not enough for parents, step parents and extended family to feel a deep glow of love for the children in your circle of influence. You must convey that feeling into a message that is heard, felt and integrated by the child. Children need to be told both verbally and non-verbally how much they are valued for just being them.
Early childhood educators have called play ?children?s work?. Many parents believe their children should be doing something more productive than merely having fun. But, actually, play fosters physical, emotional, intellectual and social development. Encouraging your child to play is vital for his development as well as his happiness.
Your daughter tells you that Uncle Charley has touched her bottom and she doesn?t like to sit on his lap anymore! Should you believe your child? Yes.
Not nearly as often as it should. Most child abuse victims never report the crime or get help in coming to grips with this life-changing trauma. They move into adulthood with a broken heart and low self esteem. Much misbehavior and acting out can be traced to an incident which occurred which left the child feeling confused, betrayed and angry.
Having been a parent educator and a PBS consultant for Ready to Learn for many years, I have had the unique opportunity to work with Head Start families, Child Care Providers, and parents as well as schools, organizations, and teachers all over the world just like you.
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent more than the plaintive cry ?nobody likes me" or ?I don?t have any friends.? We wish there were something we could do to insure our child will be, if not the most popular, at least included in the games on the playground. Actually, there is something we can do to increase their acceptance by the group and become more approachable to others.
Is there a difference between lazy and unmotivated? Why do some children move as if in slow motion? Is this normal or are they just trying to irritate you? You may be surprised to learn that a great many factors come into play when a child appears to be lazy; stage of growth, hormones, hunger, motivation, lack of clear directions and maybe even sleep deprivation.
Successful parents have learned to be both firm and kind at the same time. They set boundaries and work with their children to help them understand that they will follow through with appropriate action if inappropriate behavior continues. Don?t think when I say firmness that I really mean strictness. Strictness deals with the child; firmness is more an extension of our resolve toward our decisions.
?How many times do I have to tell you to clean your room?? Why should a child keep his room neat? Many children say they don?t care whether it is neat or dirty, so why should it matter to anyone else? Unless it is a health or safety hazard, or things are getting lost and broken? Then comes the age old question, ?What is neat?? The answer certainly differs with a ten year old child and a thirty five year old Mom. Who is setting the standard of how clean a room must be to be acceptable.
Many families today are blending members from past relationships. It would be easy to give up when faced with all the conflicting methods of parenting and discipline that come to a family who has joined forces together.
Nothing touches the heartstrings of a parent or teacher more than the plaintive cry ?nobody likes me" or?I don?t have any friends.? We wish there were something we could do to insure the child will be, if not the most popular, at least included in the games on the playground. Actually, there is something we can do to increase their acceptance by the group and become more approachable to others. We can teach them some skills and behaviors that will enhance their chances of being picked as a friend.
?Get down from the table top right now! What are you doing? Floors are for standing on, tables are for eating. You need a time out, young lady. You go to your room and think about how you have been acting today.?
Criticism is punitive
What one word best sums up summer fun? Water. I bet your favorite memories as a child involved getting wet, running through sprinklers on a sweltering afternoon, water fights in the backyard, wading at the beach, playing on the slip & slide, and skipping rocks across the river. Your kids will relish the same experiences if they share them with you.
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